A WHITE KNIGHT TRIUPHANT

I was gone for three days and the whole pack went bananas. Millions of hugs and kisses for me for two days in celebration of my homecoming. Not bad. My beloved toys and everything seems to be in place, so it feels like home. I have to admit I missed the bunch back here a bit, though the weekend was more than interesting; I got many new friends and a lot to get back to during summer vacation.

The reason for my absence was two dog shows – the beauty contests I referred to earlier on. It went as supposed: two finals and as many victories. I was the best puppy (ROP-BOB) in my category. The judges told the following:

Day 1. Judge: Valerio Nataletti Italy: Correct dans l'ensemble, belle tête por rapport & crâne, exc. l'oeil fonce & paupier noir, exc. pigmentation general, exc. truffe noir, correct dentition, correct sortie d'encolure, bon ligne de dos typique, correct poitrine & arrière, exc. texture de poic, correct demarcique & porte de queue.
Very Good Dog!

Day 2. Judge: Hans Almgren Sweden: Excellent head with strong foreface, well carried ears, strong bite, strong jaws with good depth underjaw. Nicely balanced male with typical falling croup low set hocks, strong bone. Cottony texture of coat with a little champagne colour on ears. Typical short hind movement. Excellent breed type.

They said I had potential for something. Who knows what?
I am supposed to attend the Helsinki Winner –contest in December. I am a junior then, almost grown up, you know.

But before that there is a lot to investigate in an island in the middle of a lake and at the seaside. There are mushrooms and the authorities of my pack plan to train me as a mushroom-aware truffle dog carrying them millions from the forest. There must be something mystical in truffles. I hope I will be rewarded of my efforts with tasty blackberry yoghurt…

OLIVER

I TALKED WITH LASSIE

I have to tell you about a stunning experience. I visited a dentist and it wasn´t a picnic, trust me. Two of my upper fangs were removed because I had two pairs of them. I have no idea why they had to be removed, it´s good to have a set of spare teeth in the case of losing a tooth while working out with a sturdy bone.

But, of the experience: I was totally knocked out. I have no idea what the dentist gave me but it made me a sleepy puppy with all kinds of stuff going on. I saw colors and felt like flying and then I chased a lion and talked with Lassie, and just before I woke up Elvis gave me a cracker. 

Great stuff.

LOOK - IT'S HUGE!

OLIVER

DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE

I've had it tough for the last few days. I'm talking about separation anxiety that hit me after few months. I thought I was a big boy but it has been hard to be alone for the last few days.

I let my voice be heard to make it sure I wasn't left with my own devices, but with no success. Luckily a long weekend is in front of me and I'm going to keep in close distance of our pack, not letting anyone or anything slip out of my sight.

OLIVER

THIS PICTURE TELLS THE WHOLE STORY

I´m not an amphibian, which is obvious. Water is somehow frightening, don´t know why. The pack is making forecasts of water games in the heat of the summer, boat trips and getting a captain hat for a ship dog from the island of Madagaskar. I have no idea who they are referring to, because everything that has something to do with the water element gets my hair standing up straight. Me, a sailor? What a nonsense!

OLIVER

I LIKE MY STEAK RAW

Guys from the hood were curious about my meal. The reason for the questions was my shiny white coat. Many my friends who wear white have been plaqued with red color in their nose and around their eyes. I think the reason for the color is the quality of their tears but maybe food plays also a part in the play. The breeder was convinced that I should eat some certain products to keep my looks OK.

 

In my younger days I ate Mera Dog´s puppy meals which was replaced by adult products of the same manufacturer and combined with Orijen and Acana food. 

The combination has been working; my belly is happy and my coat is clean. And what´s best: this food doesn´t have anything that would cause allergies. All the carbohydrates come from vegetables and fruits, not from grain. The amount of protein is high and it´s good quality. The authorities of my pack has provided all three different brands of food from a peculiar place called the Internet. It must be a dog food store of some kind.

I know that the female authority is interested in BARF-feeding, which mean I would get raw meat for dinner, but she hesitates because it could mean difficulties to summon meals for me that would contain all the necessary vitamins to keep me up and running.
 It would require some extra effort for a busy city dweller, that´s true, especially when all there is to do is stroll half a block to the nearest store to collect the catch. Get a grip of yourself, I say! And bring me a sturdy piece of meat, with some yoghurt and blackberries – of course.

OLIVER

MY KINGDOM IS EXPANDING

It´s my way to make sure who is boss around here. The leading authorities of my pack have suspicions that I will look like the last of the Mohicans after rubbing myself in stone walls, who knows; maybe it´s soon time to lift a leg.

OLIVER

COTON THE WHITE KNIGHT DON´T GIVE A RATS ASS ABOUT MITES

The leaders of my pack keep on talking about the mites and other horrible parasites the summer will bring along. I can´t speak for myself but it must be a question of monsters of epic propotions. There are even plans to use strong poisons required from the pharmacy against them. I have a simple solution: I eat them. My menu has already gotten variety of flies, paralyzed bee and goose poop. I am sure I can deal with mites using my cobra-like speed, the dexterity of a mountain lion and ferocity of a great white shark. I am a lean mean fighting machine.

Only thing I am worried about is that the leaders of my pack will screw everything up by causing me an allergic reaction, nausea or something like that with their ridiculous voodoo potions and superstition. The high priest of black arts they call a doctor recommended a poison called Bayvantic but the pharmacy had run out of it. No wonder considering the lack of judgement most humans. So I got a dose of Frontline, which the leaders of my pack hope will frighten away the terrible mites.

Ps. Because of these monsters I have been refused the comforts of the gigantic paradise island in which the leaders of my pack spend their nights. I have done everything to sneak in the overwhelming softness of this dream come true, but with minor success. I suppose it is time to use the broadsword of cuteness against the prejudicies and conquer the paradise.  

OLIVER